It’s been a bit of a rough weekend here . . . my position at the lovely local Catholic School has been eliminated because of low enrollment . . . we don’t have enough kids enrolled for next year to generate the income needed to support the current amount of staff and faculty. I found out on Friday that my services were no longer needed . . . and Friday was my last day. I cleaned out my office and started a second round of semi-retirement.
To say that I’m a hot damn mess is an understatement. I received a generous severance package that includes my two weeks of vacation pay but I haven’t been “let go” from a job in over 30 years and have all kinds of worst case scenarios playing in my head. Yes, it’s scary and I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed at the moment, but it’s okay . . . I know that I’ve got this and can face the new challenges ahead of me. Heck, I faced my worst nightmare and am still standing and I’m pretty sure I can face this. After all, there’s Rocky and Millie and their undying devotion and dedication to making me smile. I’ve seen several beautiful bright red cardinals in the back yard which is a sign that my guardian angels aren’t far away.
Like I said, I’m a hot damn mess but have managed to keep it together . . . when the boss told me that I was being let go . . . when I opened the front door and saw Rocky’s happy face and started to panic that I had no idea how I was going to support us . . . when I saw the sadness in my Mom’s face as I told her and I saw the sadness in her face when she realized that the job I loved was gone.
But the thing that finally broke me . . . was my silly Echo Dot. Today, Amazon released a new skill – Christmas Sounds – and I had to try it out. Because I’m a total dork when it comes to Alexa and all the cool things she can do. I asked Alexa to play Christmas sounds and since I haven’t enabled the correct skill, Alexa has no idea what I’m talking about . . . so she plays Christmas songs from Amazon Music . . . and the song she chooses to play for me is none other than “O Holy Night” by Bing Crosby.
Yes . . . a Christmas song by Bing Crosby is what reduced me to a puddle of tears . . . because “O Holy Night” was THE song that the junior high choir that Prince Charming and I were in back in the day sang EVERY CHRISTMAS. We started practicing it when school started in August and sang it practically every day until Christmas. For three years. I know every word. I can still sing my alto part perfectly . . . and this song is the one thing that Prince Charming and I had in common all the years we were apart. I thought of him and could remember hearing his beautiful bass voice singing his part . . . and he thought of me and could remember hearing my (according to him) lovely alto voice. When we got back together that first Christmas, it was a joy to be able to sing the song together again every time it was on the radio. And Bing Crosby was one of Prince Charming’s favorite singers of Christmas songs . . . to hear our song sung by his favorite singer at a totally random moment in April was a sign that I’m not alone. He’s watching me and telling me that I can do this . . . I can face this and I’ll be just fine.
Even when I’m not all that convinced of it myself just yet . . .
Love is . . . braving a torrential downpour to get your dogs from the kennel because they hate thunderstorms and you can’t bear the thought of them being away from you and being afraid.
Even though you hate driving in torrential downpours and talked to them the entire drive home because you didn’t want them to think you were as afraid as they were.
Prince Charming was a big kid when it came to Christmas. He loved everything about the holiday.
That’s what made celebrating it this year so hard.
But I did celebrate.
I decorated the tree. I put lights up outside. I bought presents.
The hardest part, though, was the Christmas cards. It was something he took great pride in. And took great pains to get just right. Finding the perfect picture for the card was important to him.
And now it’s important to me.
How do I find “the” picture that would depict my year?
I wanted something with me and the doggies. I wanted to show that we are learning to cope with our new life.
This is what I settled on
It was taken shortly after Prince Charming moved in. If you look closely, you’ll see his shoulder and his arm behind Millie. It seemed perfect. It was us – with Prince Charming there but just slightly out of focus.
We are learning to cope. We are starting to smile. We miss him terribly.
This isn’t ever going to get easier is it?
Happy New Year!
Yes I’ve been away a long time. I’m sorry. I really am. No honest. But I’m going to strive to do better. In 2014 I’m going to write one blog post a day.
Now really is laughing like that nice? Gesh.
Once you catch your breath I’ll continue.
Life is good. The dogs are good. Millie lost 20 lbs and is acting like a puppy again. Rocky is happy to have her to play with again but there are times when he wishes she would leave him alone.
Fluff decided he wanted to live here full time. The dogs aren’t happy but they are dealing with it. Prince Charming isn’t completely thrilled either but he’s dealing with it too.
Prince Charming and I are good. I can’t believe it’s been almost three years.
I promise I’ll be back tomorrow with more stuff!
Prince Charming and I bought a new TV as a Christmas present to ourselves. Thank Heavens for Layaway! It’s a lovely 39 inch flat screen HDTV. I’m so excited that we will finally be able to read the little crawlers on the bottom of the screen. Of course the new TV will not fit on the entertainment center that I have now so we bought a new TV stand.
Our dilemma today is what to do with the old entertainment center. We don’t have room to keep the old one after we put together the new one. That’s when I got the bright idea to post a picture online to see if I could get rid of it.
I told you that story to tell you this story. When I got the camera out to take a picture of the entertainment center, I saw this
As soon as Millie saw I took Rocky’s picture she had to be included
See her sneaking behind Rocky?
Then a true miracle happened! I was able to get a picture of both of them at the same time without either one bothering the other!
Maybe they know Santa is watching? Boringly normal is back and we couldn’t be happier!
(This one is for Beth!)
Cassano’s pizza for supper.
Prince Charming watching is favorite show.
I’m trying to figure out my iPod touch. It didn’t come with an instruction manual so I had to buy one . . . and it reads just like (duh!) an instruction manual!
Rocky and Millie are outside playing with the puppies next door and chasing lightning bugs.
It’s been rough couple of weeks with Princess and GrandGirl Drama and Allergies From You-Know-Where . . . but I’ve survived . . . I always seem to survive . . . and that’s always a good thing!
But the weekend is here . . . and that’s always a good thing, too!
Yep, I’m up early again.
Silly cell phone went off with a weather alert. Wouldn’t have been so bad except Prince Charming’s cell phone went off at the same time. We both subscribe to the local weather alerts.
Once Millie hears an alarm, she’s up and thinks we need to be up too. Time to play! Time for breakfast! Time to potty! Not necessarily in that order.
While they’re outside I’m reading my Nook . . . actually my friend’s Nook . . . she has a book that she thought I needed to read but can’t “lend” it to me . . . Poor Prince Charming . . . now I have two Nooks to distract me!
I need to be doing laundry . . . I really ought to be finishing my latest cross stitch piece . . . I’m having fun watching the dogs romp in the ice and snow that fell last night . . . I should be watching the weather on the local news to find out about the winter storm that came through last night . . . I’m sure Prince Charming is gonna ask about it when he wakes up.
Hopefully I get to spend the day right here at home doing all of the above . . . or none of the above . . .
After the rough week I’ve had I’m happy for to have some quiet time.