I live in Ohio . . . I work at the local Public Library . . . the library has been closed since March 18 . . . that makes today Day 17 of the Quarantine.
I work in the business office and am considered an “essential” employee and am lucky enough to work from home . . . I have a laptop, a mobile hotspot device and set up a work space in the basement in Prince Charming’s Ham Radio area (he called it his Ham Shack). It’s a little chilly so I bought an “office cardigan” and a little space heater to keep me warm in my new work space. Except for the whole “world health crisis” thing, life is pretty good . . .
With the trouble I have with my low level anxiety, I’m surprised that this hasn’t thrown me off the deep end. I’m not having any problems with stress or worry . . . I guess the whole “I’ve already faced my worst nightmare” thing has prepared me nicely for this new reality . . .
That being said . . . I do worry about my Mom’s health . . . she’s 85 and has some underlying health issues . . . I’m concerned about BIL #1’s health . . . he was diagnosed with Parkinson’s a couple of years ago . . . I’m worried about Baby Sister as she struggles with anxiety and is not doing well facing this crisis . . . but I’m confident we will get through this . . . we’re tough cookies.
I’m enjoying having time at home with the dogs. Millie is THRILLED that I’m home all the time because that means more cookies. Rocky is not thrilled. I’m home all the time which means that Millie is spending a lot more time out of her crate and BOTHERING him as he’s trying to nap.
There’s a zillion things I SHOULD be doing . . . cleaning . . . organizing . . . reading . . . working on my cross stitch projects . . . finding new recipes in my cookbooks . . . and I’m not doing any of that . . .
I’m walking the dogs and enjoying watching spring arrive in my little part of Ohio. I’m watching stupid TV shows and catching up on my soaps. I’m reading a lot of silly stuff on the internet . . . and some very serious stuff. My world stops at 2 pm every day for the Governor’s daily press conference . . . we call it “Wine With DeWine”!
Yes, the coronavirus stuff is serious. It’s scary. It’s a strange and scary new world we live in. But there are a few silver linings in those ugly black storm clouds.
You go through life thinking you have a grip on things.
You make plans. You have a “road map” for your future and you know where you want to go and how to get there.
You plan your work and work your plan.
What we always forget is that God sometimes has other plans for us. And God rarely shares those plans with us.
We thought that Prince Charming’s Dad was going to beat the cancer and be in remission in a few weeks. The chemo and radiation treatments were working. Even though the treatments were rough on him physically . . . they were working and we had hope that it would end up being okay.
But God had other plans for Prince Charming’s Dad and called him Home on Tuesday.
It was quick. It was completely unexpected. It was unrelated to the cancer. It was a massive heart attack that took Prince Charming’s Dad away.
To say we are in shock would be an understatement.
The results are in!
Yes, Prince Charming’s Dad has cancer.
It’s small cell lung cancer . . . from what I understand that’s the “bad” kind of cancer.
Well, poop! That isn’t what we wanted to hear!
Okay, they talk to the cancer doc. The cancer doc needs more info before he can talk prognosis and/or treatment options . . .
Blood work and more scans . . .
More waiting . . .
The cancer hasn’t spread! They can’t cure what he’s got but they have a good chance of getting it into remission.
Plans are for radiation and chemo over the next few weeks . . .
We still have a rough bit of road ahead of us . . . but it doesn’t look nearly as bleak as we originally thought.
Our guardian angels must have been watching over us . . .
Monday was the 36th anniversary of my first date with Prince Charming. Yes, I know it’s amazing that I remembered the date after all the years we spent apart. But he’s my Prince Charming and I’ve remembered lots of little details about our time together. What is even more amazing is that Prince Charming ALSO remembered the anniversary! Okay, so he didn’t remember the EXACT date but he did remember it was sometime in the middle of November.
We had a special romantic dinner and then spent the evening slow dancing in the living room to some very special songs. It was wonderful!
But before we could have the anniversary celebration . . . we went with his parents to the Big City Hospital so that his dad could have a biopsy on the spot they found on his lung. The biopsy went as well as could be expected. The preliminary news was about what we expected. Not good news but we would learn more details at the follow-up appointment at the end of the week.
It was very strange to be so excited to be spending the entire day with Prince Charming knowing that the first part of the day was going to be so difficult for everyone. I felt guilty about the plans that we had to celebrate the anniversary and asked Prince Charming if he wanted to delay it a day or so. He said that wasn’t an option. It was the first time in 34 years that we were able to celebrate that special day together and it was as important to him as it is to me. He also said that if we were going to be dealing with a long term illness for his dad, we would need to make as much of our lives as normal as possible. We need this celebration.
So the news turned out to be as bad as we expected. We don’t have all the details yet. There’s still one more follow-up appointment with another specialist to get all the treatment details worked out. Like Prince Charming said, in the meantime life marches on. Thanksgiving is around the corner. Christmas follows close behind. New Year’s Eve . . . all the things that he and I have been waiting for with such great anticipation. All of the excitement of all the “firsts” of a new romance . . . are now tainted with the realization that it might also be “lasts” as well.
Into every life a little rain must fall.
I knew this day was gonna come eventually . . . I thought/hoped/prayed we would have more time to prepare. But God doesn’t share his timetable with us.
Prince Charming’s dad has lung cancer.
Well, actually, he has a mass in his lung that is “more than likely” lung cancer. It’s a 3cm by 3cm mass that’s attached to the right bronchi where it goes into the lung. I have no idea what that means, that’s how it was described to me by Prince Charming after his parents talked to the lung doc.
A biopsy is scheduled for the week before Thanksgiving and the results will be shared a few days later.
Prince Charming’s reaction was like he’d been punched in the gut. Was this the reason he felt compelled to come home when his life was falling apart?
His parents are rather stoic and matter-of-fact about the whole thing. They are telling us the usual things that you say when facing something like this. It is what it is. We don’t know anything for sure yet. We will wait for the results and make decisions then.
I’m playing the role of the supportive significant other. I’m listening to Prince Charming explain what he knows, how he feels, what he fears. I’m going sit in the waiting room with Prince Charming and his mom the day of the biopsy. He’s a little overwhelmed with the love and support that I’ve given him the past few days. I explained to Prince Charming that my job is to take care of him so he can take care of the parents. He’s calling me his rock.
I’m having a serious case of Déjà vu.
I’ve been dealing with all kinds of drama lately . . . most of it doesn’t directly affect me . . . but it’s still stuff you don’t want to happen to your family
Bowler Man – married to Little Sister – works for a Cadillac dealership. He got the news on Wednesday that the dealership is closing. The official closing date is December 31, 2009, but Bowler Man thinks that he’ll be lucky to hang onto his job for another 60 to 90 days. He works in the parts department and has been with the dealership for 12 years. It’s not going to be an easy transition for him.
Trey – the oldest grandson – didn’t graduate with his class. Jr is still in the process of figuring out options for Trey to get his high school diploma. Hubby and I have tried to explain to Jr that since Trey is 18 and doesn’t live with him, Jr can’t force Trey to do anything. It’s ultimately Trey’s decision and since Trey lives with his mom (JrEx), it’s up to JrEx to set some rules. Not exactly her strong suit and that’s what has Jr all fired up.
Princess and her drama . . . not much I can do about this situation. It’s her life, these are her decisions, I just have to make sure that Hubby and I don’t get sucked into the drama. Should be easy for me since she’s still not talking to me. Made her visit on Friday night very interesting.
My mom tells me that I’m a tough cookie and I can handle anything that God throws at me. Ordinarily, I would agree but I learned something today that makes me doubt my strength. With all the medical stuff that I’ve dealt with over the years concerning MIL’s and FIL’s health, dealing with medical dramas of any sort are a piece of cake. Step in, be strong, do the research, give advice. That’s what I do. But it’s totally different when the health issues concern your Dad. Your strong as a horse, never sick a day in his life, former Marine Dad. It may be nothing. It may be something. We have to wait and see. It might resolve itself like it has over the past couple of years. Or it might not and we’re looking at a long term serious health problem.
I’m just not ready for this.