“You wouldn’t understand. You’ve never had kids.”
“It’s not like you have kids or anything.”
Without a doubt, those are some of the most hurtful words I’ve ever heard.
I ended a 40 year friendship because of that remark.
Hearing my XH say those words to me marked the beginning of the end of our marriage.
And today I heard them from a co-worker. From the last person I ever thought would say such a thing. From someone who should know better than to say something like that to a co-worker. From the HR Director.
It may have been an off-hand comment with no intention to be mean and hurtful.
But it hurt.
And it seemed mean.
She didn’t know if I was “childless by choice”
She didn’t know if I struggled with infertility and was unable to get pregnant.
She didn’t know if I was able to get pregnant but not carry a baby to term.
She didn’t know if I was able to carry a baby to term but there were complications and the baby didn’t survive.
All she knows is “No, I don’t have children” and she used that information against me to prove a point in a senseless debate that she probably won’t remember tomorrow.
But I’ll remember that conversation for a long time. And it will affect me for a long time. And it will color my relationship and all my future interactions with her and will limit what kind of personal information I choose to share with her and, possibly, other co-workers.
And that will make me seem “standoffish” and “cold” and she’ll never understand why . . .
Tonight I had supper with Princess Charming and her two adorable little boys . . .
They got to the restaurant before me . . . after I arrived and sat down, Princess Charming told Little Man to show me his new hat.
“Oh, darlin’, that’s a beautiful hat!”
Then I looked at Princess Charming and she looked at me and we both had the same thought at the same time . . .
Little Man looks so much like his Papaw Prince Charming that we can’t even stand it. Princess Charming said that Little Man put the hat on as soon as he saw it and asked, ever so sweetly, “Mommy, can I have this hat?” How could Mommy say no?
Princess Charming and I both think that Prince Charming had a hand in helping Little Man pick out that particular hat . . .
And, not surprisingly, Prince Charming just knew that I needed to see Little Man in that hat tonight.
Prince Charming has been gone 60 days.
It still seems like it was just yesterday.
I still expect him to come home.
Young grandson #3 arrived on Thursday – the 2 month anniversary. It was so sad for me. Prince Charming should have been here for this. And the “he’s here in spirit” thing just annoys me.
And Grandson #3 looks just like Prince Charming as a baby. And has Prince Charming’s middle name. Charming Son surprised me with that gift.
Even in my sadness, I have many blessings.
Prince Charming and I bought a new TV as a Christmas present to ourselves. Thank Heavens for Layaway! It’s a lovely 39 inch flat screen HDTV. I’m so excited that we will finally be able to read the little crawlers on the bottom of the screen. Of course the new TV will not fit on the entertainment center that I have now so we bought a new TV stand.
Our dilemma today is what to do with the old entertainment center. We don’t have room to keep the old one after we put together the new one. That’s when I got the bright idea to post a picture online to see if I could get rid of it.
I told you that story to tell you this story. When I got the camera out to take a picture of the entertainment center, I saw this
As soon as Millie saw I took Rocky’s picture she had to be included
See her sneaking behind Rocky?
Then a true miracle happened! I was able to get a picture of both of them at the same time without either one bothering the other!
Maybe they know Santa is watching? Boringly normal is back and we couldn’t be happier!
The on-again, off-again relationship with Princess and the GrandGirls is in the off-again stage.
(While I’m sad to be missing the GrandGirls’ graduation, I’m doing a happy dance to not have to deal with their drama for the time being.)
There was an argument and some mean and hurtful things were said to me.
I would have probably said mean and hurtful things, too, if I had been able to get a word in edgewise.
Apparently, XH is also upset about what’s happened. After 30 years (yes, you read that correctly) of this nonsense, XH has decided it’s finally time to stand up to Princess and wants Princess and GrandGirl apologize for the disrespect that has been shown to me. (Uh, who is this man and what has he done with my ex-husband?)
Princess told XH she doesn’t owe me anything and she’s done with me. (And this time she means it! Excuse me if I’m not completely convinced she’s gone for good this time!)
Her last words to me were to “have a nice life” and “good-bye”
Then to top it all off . . . Princess’ Mom told XH to tell me (are we still in jr high?) that if I don’t stop harassing Princess and the GrandGirls . . . they are going to put a restraining order out on me.
Wait . . . you call me, pick a fight with me, call me names, hang up on me and YOU are going to file a restraining order on ME? And you have your mom tell your dad to deliver a message to me?
Seriously, folks, I couldn’t make this stuff up if I tried!
(This one is for Beth!)
Cassano’s pizza for supper.
Prince Charming watching is favorite show.
I’m trying to figure out my iPod touch. It didn’t come with an instruction manual so I had to buy one . . . and it reads just like (duh!) an instruction manual!
Rocky and Millie are outside playing with the puppies next door and chasing lightning bugs.
It’s been rough couple of weeks with Princess and GrandGirl Drama and Allergies From You-Know-Where . . . but I’ve survived . . . I always seem to survive . . . and that’s always a good thing!
But the weekend is here . . . and that’s always a good thing, too!
Oh goodness . . . I didn’t realize it’s been a month since I posted.
I’ve been busy . . .
Prince Charming and I went to see the “Three Stooges” movie.
Prince Charming and I went to the Air Force Museum.
Easter celebration with the family.
Drama with best girl friend #1.
Drama with best girl friend #2.
Drama with Princess, XH’s XW #1, and Grandson #2 and his little girlfriend.
Granddaughter #1 told me that I’m gonna be a Great-Grandma in December.
Happy developments with Prince Charming’s Beautiful Daughter.
Not-so-happy developments with Prince Charming’s divorce.
Working on Spring Cleaning To Do List.
Working on this years “Home Improvement Project” List.
I promise that I’ll share details later!
Oh, yea, and nagging Prince Charming about his guest post.
Life is good . . .