Category Archives: coping

#singlegirllife

Over the past four years, I’ve learned to adapt to the #singlegirllife . . . but since I didn’t really have a choice or a say in the matter I jumped in with both feet and hoped for the best.

I discovered the joy of not having a routine for household chores.  If I want to change up the grocery day, it didn’t upset anyone . . . except when I ran out of dog treats for Rocky and Millie.  If I want to do laundry at 7 am on a Sunday (yea, it’s happened), then I can without fear of waking anyone up.

If I want to go to The Big City on a Saturday morning and visit the local needlework shop, I can do that . . . as long as I don’t stay gone too long and make it home in time to give supper to the puppies.

I discovered the joy of choosing whatever I wanted for supper.  If I wanted to eat Cap’n Crunch over the sink with a glass of chocolate milk for supper . . . that’s what I had.  If I wanted to grab tacos from Taco Bell on the way home from work because it’s cheaper than cooking them myself . . . I headed to the drive-thru.  If I wanted to eat spaghetti four days in a row . . . I ate spaghetti four days in a row.

I learned that I can do the yard work myself . . . even though I don’t really enjoy it.

I learned that I can handle making decisions about home improvement or home repairs relatively intelligently . . . even though the entire process brings out massive amounts of anxiety and triggers a horrible panic attack.

I bought a car.  I bought a washer.  I bought a computer.  I bought furniture.  All things I’ve never done before and had no idea the amount of detail and research involved in such purchases.

I’ve learned that I can stand on my own two feet.  I haven’t lost the house.  The utilities haven’t been turned off.  I haven’t killed the dogs.  I’m not broke.  All things XH predicted would happen within six months after the divorce . . . and it’s been 7 years . . .

But there is one thing that I am struggling with.  Something so small and insignificant that it makes me laugh that I’m having a problem with it.  The #singlegirllife means that you are the one that takes care of you when you’re sick.  I have the flu.  I very mild case with some general muscle and joint aches, some severe tiredness, and a stupid headache that won’t go away.  I’m feel like poop . . . and I’m cranky . . . and I want someone to bring me soup, bring me tea, snuggle on the couch with me while I nap . . . and there isn’t anyone here to do that.  Sure, Rocky and Millie do their best but without opposable thumbs, they pretty much suck in the food prep department . . .

Yea, there are some other really bad drawbacks to this #singlegirllife . . . but today this is the one that’s really pissing me off . . .

And, yes, I’ve said more than once to no one in particular but directed at Prince Charming . . . I really hate your ass right now . . .

 

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Longest Week EVER

Today was my first full week at work since December 19 . . . with Christmas break, the MLK holiday and snow days caused by the horrible weather we had early this month I’ve only worked two or three days a week for almost a month.  It was heavenly.  Until this week . . . no holiday, no snow days, and the anniversary of Prince Charming’s death all conspired to make this a long awful week for me . . . I am thankful that it’s over . . .

But there are things that made my heart happy this week . . ..

I figured out the 5k races I’ll be doing this year . . .

I finalized my vacation schedule for this year . . . three cross stitch retreats and a trip to Florida . . .

Rocky seems to be responding well to the meds for his arthritis.  His “slow getting up in the morning” turned into a significant limp and I took him to visit Lovely Vet to have it checked out.  Turns out the limp was a sprain of some sort and the “slow getting up in the morning” is probably arthritis . . . “he is getting older, you know” is how Lovely Vet described it to me.

The school where I work is installing new playground equipment for the little kids (k-2) that moved into our building earlier this year.  I’ve gotten to watch the workers install the equipment with great delight . . . I’m going to swing on the swings and go down the slide this summer during my lunch hour!!  Today’s highlight was watching a bobcat expert move a huge pile of mulch from the staging area to the playground area.  It was fascinating!

So now I’m headed to the couch with my dessert of choice to watch “Friday Night Frasier” on Netflix . . .

Even during the darkest weeks, life is good . . .

 

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This Old House

The Little House is about 95 years old.  I’ve lived here for 27 years.  I’ve learned the quirks and eccentricities of this lovely old house.   It’s what makes it the perfect little house for me.

One of the first things I learned about The Little House is that the pipes freeze.  The kitchen sink is in a part of the house that is built over a crawl space.  The pipes run along the outside wall.  If you don’t let the faucet drip a little when it gets cold, the pipes will freeze.  Happened one of the first years XH and I lived here . . . we were lucky that the pipes didn’t burst when they thawed out and we never EVER let that happen again.  A good bit of my anxiety over the winter is trying to remember if I let the faucet drip or not.

Now that I live here by myself, I’m doubly anxious about forgetting to leave the faucet dripping.  I’ve been known to get out of a warm comfy bed at night to double check . . . can anyone say OCD?

It’s been bitterly cold here in my little part of Ohio for a while now . . . and today we are experiencing a January thaw.  For the first time since Christmas, the temps here are above freezing . . . and I figured it was safe to turn off the faucet.

I didn’t turn off my brain though . . .

As I was coming up the stairs from taking a shower this morning, I noticed that the kitchen faucet wasn’t dripping . . . and I totally freaked out.  You should note that I had just taken a shower . . . a nice hot shower . . . a fact that had totally escaped my poor little OCD “leave the water drip” brain . . .

I went to the sink to turn the faucet back on and happened to look at the thermometer in the kitchen window . . . and saw it was 34 degrees . . . and started laughing . . . because it was at that moment that I remembered looking at the thermometer and turning off the faucet as I headed downstairs to take a shower.

Be nice to me.  I’m a natural blonde . . . .

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So Much For Flying Under The Radar

January 20 is a sucky day for me . . . it’s the anniversary of the day that Prince Charming left this Earth.  I probably shouldn’t focus/obsess over the date but I can’t help it.  It’s the day my life changed forever . . . through no fault of my own and not necessarily in a good way . . .

Last year about Christmas time I realized that January 20 was also Inauguration Day.  The day we got a new president.  A day full of all the pomp and circumstance and ceremony . . . stuff that I normally love.  Yes, I’m a patriotic geek.  I live for this kind of stuff . . . and suddenly I realized that one of my favorite events was going to be happening on my most un-favorite day.

Shitdamnhellfuck . . .

So I put on my big girl panties and dealt with it.  I was able, somehow, to separate the two events and keep them separate . . . as long as I forgot that the date was January 20 . . . it wasn’t easy but I did it.

I got through that day . . . like I’ve gotten through a bunch of other terrible, awful, horrible, very bad days (bonus points if you get the reference in that sentence).  By putting one foot in front of the other.

I was home today because the school I work for is closed for the Martin Luther King holiday (another day that kinda sucks for me because the day Prince Charming left was also Martin Luther King Day) . . . and I heard something that took my breath away . . . something I was totally not expecting or prepared for . . .

“January 20 is the one year anniversary of President Donald Trump’s inauguration.”  Said by one of the hosts of CBS This Morning . . .

Shitdamnhellfuck . . .

Just when I thought that I was going to be able to have that day fly under the radar . . . I got Gibbs slapped (bonus points if you get THAT reference) up side my head . . .

The next few days are gonna suck . . .

On a positive note . . . I’ve also learned that Saturday, January 20 the Cincinnati Zoo is having a first birthday party for media darling Fiona . . . for my favorite hippo . . .

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November 26

I had some work done to The Little House over the last month or so.  Nothing terribly serious . . . just a repair to a drain pipe and replacing the basement shower.

Just enough to trigger my homeowner anxiety . . . am I doing the right thing?  Oh shit, how expensive is this going to be?  Is this ever going to get finished?  Will it be what I wanted?

Everything turned out fine . . . project wasn’t horribly over budget but a rainy streak did put a bit of a damper on getting the outside stuff done quickly.  Shower is done and working fine . . . except I needed a light for the shower.

Did some research.  Did some shopping.  Found a workable alternative to installing a light in the shower.  I bought a “project light” to put on the floor outside of the shower to shine light into the shower.  Works just fine.  Light was on sale at the Big Box Hardware Store.  Pretty pleased with the solution if I do say so myself.

Brought the light home and took it out of the box.  There’s a space on the instruction/warranty booklet for the purchase date and the serial number.  And it suggested stapling the receipt to the booklet for easy reference.  I did not hesitate to do those items.  Because it’s what my Dad did every time he bought an appliance, a tool, or just about anything.  There’s a drawer in my parent’s house with all sorts of booklets – some of them for things they no longer own.  Dad’s advice was “You never know when you might need that” and so I also have a “information” drawer with all sorts of instruction/warranty booklets . . .

Yes, I heard Dad’s voice tell me “you better fill that out, Pamela” . . . when I saw the booklet in the bottom of the box . . . and I couldn’t rest until I had it safely in the drawer.

Yes, Dad . . . I did listen . . .

 

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November 13

Seems like “senioritis” has hit the kids at the school where I work extremely early this year.

The seniors are hanging in the office during their last period study hall and annoying  me and the school secretary . . .

Is it strange that the staff are counting the days until Christmas break as much as the students are?

 

 

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November 6

Today is Monday . . . I hate Mondays . . .

Especially the Monday after the Fall Time Change . . . the kids at school seem to have more energy and are a little more irritating . . .

It gets dark early . . . the security lights on the garage came on tonight at 5:30 . . . it’s dark enough for security lights at 5:30 pm . . . makes for a very long night . . .

I went to dinner like I always do on Monday night.  Tonight’s dinner choice was a restaurant that is offering me free bagels every day this month.  I feel guilty if I go in just for the free bagel so I bought dinner there tonight.  The soup and salad combo I usually get is very yummy . . . and since it’s on the chilly side here the warm soup was comforting.

All in all, it was an irritating Monday but not a Bad Monday . . .

Then the server behind the counter called the name for the next customer to pick up their order.  The name they called out was the same name as Prince Charming’s name.  My heart skipped a beat and I did a double take to see who would answer to that name.  The guy didn’t look anything like Prince Charming . . . but I did give him a warm smile because he caught me staring at him.

Big Sigh . . . back to my yummy soup and sandwich . . .

I must be making progress because instead of focusing on unexpectedly hearing Prince Charming’s name tugging on my heart strings, I’m excited about the 99 cent cookie and the free bagel

Any Monday with a free bagel can’t be all bad . . .

 

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