I have Christmas spirit . . . I’m excited about seeing the decorations downtown . . . I’m excited to see the Church decorated for Advent . . . I’m looking forward to the Charlie Brown Christmas special on TV on Thursday . . . I got out the tree . . . I ordered Christmas Cards . . . I’m doing some shopping . . . but . . .
My heart isn’t in it . . . I know I SHOULD do this, that, or the other thing . . . and I have done some decorating . . . I have bought some presents . . . but . . .
My heart isn’t in it this year . . .
I’m not really sure why . . .
Maybe it’s because I’ve had a sudden realization that it’s the 5th Christmas without Prince Charming. Maybe it’s because I’m watching my Mom go to the “year three” struggles where she is realizing that this grief thing might linger a lot longer than she anticipated . . .
Maybe it’s because I’m realizing that this grief thing is gonna linger a lot longer than I anticipated . . .