The loss of my job was rather sudden . . . for me . . . I kinda had an idea that it might happen but didn’t really think it would . . .
It was rather sudden for my co-workers . . . and for my friends . . . they knew I loved my job and was very happy at the Local Catholic School . . .
There have been rumors for years that Local Catholic School was struggling financially and that it might close . . . these rumors were floating around way back when I was in high school almost *cough* 40 *cough* years ago . . .
I haven’t posted anything on social media about my unexpected adventure into semi-retirement . . . and anything I’ve said to anyone has been positive and upbeat . . . I promised my boss I would paint a positive picture of the events and emphasize my support for Local Catholic School . . . as a lifelong resident of this town, I love Local Catholic School as much as the alumni and want to see it succeed as much as anyone, it wasn’t personal . . . it was business . . . it happens . . . and I’ve survived way worse than the loss of a job . . .
So picture me surprised when my former boss contacted me to ask about a FB post that had been shared with him about my use of the words “declining enrollment” describing the reasons why my job was eliminated. Picture me even more surprised when I remembered that the post in question was not about my job situation but about a national hotel chain allowing dogs to stay for free at their properties . . . the use of the offending words was in a response to a response of a comment someone made on the post . . . unless you read every word of that particular post you would have never seen that particular sentence.
I told my former boss that it wasn’t my intention to ever paint Local Catholic School in a negative light (in the comment I expressed my hope that things turned around and enrollment would increase in the coming months) and that I would remove the post to avoid any further problems.
Then I got to thinking . . . who the hell has that much time on their hands that they read every word of every one of my posts and then has to run to the COO of Local Catholic School to ask for verification of the “facts” that I presented? Who in their right might wouldn’t automatically think that budget cuts two years in a row didn’t have something to do with declining enrollment? Are the parents that much in denial that they don’t already know that the school is struggling? Or are they trying to keep the perfect picture of Local Catholic School out there for the community and don’t want anything to tarnish that image?
So once again . . . I have to watch what I say to avoid stepping on someone’s toes on my own FB page . . . social media is a powerful thing . . . and it fucking sucks . . .
Being suddenly unemployed is stressful. I’m worried about how I’m gonna pay the bills. I’m worried about finding a new job. I’m not exactly a spring chicken . . . which I was reminded of when I had the phone interview with the lady at unemployment office. I have 35 years of administrative assistant experience. I have 25 years of experience as an executive assistant. I have 9 years of experience being a bookkeeper. I’m worried about screwing up my unemployment claim and not getting any help . . . . and then when I realized how little money I would get with unemployment, I’m back to worrying about paying the bills.
Being suddenly unemployed is also somewhat relaxing. I don’t have to punch a time clock, so I don’t have to go to bed early or get up early. I can lounge around in my jammies and answer emails and research jobs. I can have lunch in front of the TV and watch my soaps.
But one thing that I discovered quickly is that I have no concept of days anymore. It’s only been a week and I have no idea what day of the week it is anymore. I almost forgot that I needed to set out the trash last night. If it hadn’t been for a lovely reminder text from Stepdaughter, I would have forgotten to pick up Grandson #2 from school and take him to t-ball practice today.
I’m embracing this new career development as a chance to see what else is out there and I’m overall excited about the future . . . when I’m not stressing over tiny details. But I think I need to get into a routine of some sort . . . and I’m kinda hoping I can win the lottery and stay retired!!
It’s been a bit of a rough weekend here . . . my position at the lovely local Catholic School has been eliminated because of low enrollment . . . we don’t have enough kids enrolled for next year to generate the income needed to support the current amount of staff and faculty. I found out on Friday that my services were no longer needed . . . and Friday was my last day. I cleaned out my office and started a second round of semi-retirement.
To say that I’m a hot damn mess is an understatement. I received a generous severance package that includes my two weeks of vacation pay but I haven’t been “let go” from a job in over 30 years and have all kinds of worst case scenarios playing in my head. Yes, it’s scary and I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed at the moment, but it’s okay . . . I know that I’ve got this and can face the new challenges ahead of me. Heck, I faced my worst nightmare and am still standing and I’m pretty sure I can face this. After all, there’s Rocky and Millie and their undying devotion and dedication to making me smile. I’ve seen several beautiful bright red cardinals in the back yard which is a sign that my guardian angels aren’t far away.
Like I said, I’m a hot damn mess but have managed to keep it together . . . when the boss told me that I was being let go . . . when I opened the front door and saw Rocky’s happy face and started to panic that I had no idea how I was going to support us . . . when I saw the sadness in my Mom’s face as I told her and I saw the sadness in her face when she realized that the job I loved was gone.
But the thing that finally broke me . . . was my silly Echo Dot. Today, Amazon released a new skill – Christmas Sounds – and I had to try it out. Because I’m a total dork when it comes to Alexa and all the cool things she can do. I asked Alexa to play Christmas sounds and since I haven’t enabled the correct skill, Alexa has no idea what I’m talking about . . . so she plays Christmas songs from Amazon Music . . . and the song she chooses to play for me is none other than “O Holy Night” by Bing Crosby.
Yes . . . a Christmas song by Bing Crosby is what reduced me to a puddle of tears . . . because “O Holy Night” was THE song that the junior high choir that Prince Charming and I were in back in the day sang EVERY CHRISTMAS. We started practicing it when school started in August and sang it practically every day until Christmas. For three years. I know every word. I can still sing my alto part perfectly . . . and this song is the one thing that Prince Charming and I had in common all the years we were apart. I thought of him and could remember hearing his beautiful bass voice singing his part . . . and he thought of me and could remember hearing my (according to him) lovely alto voice. When we got back together that first Christmas, it was a joy to be able to sing the song together again every time it was on the radio. And Bing Crosby was one of Prince Charming’s favorite singers of Christmas songs . . . to hear our song sung by his favorite singer at a totally random moment in April was a sign that I’m not alone. He’s watching me and telling me that I can do this . . . I can face this and I’ll be just fine.
Even when I’m not all that convinced of it myself just yet . . .