Been There, Done That

The other night I had the opportunity to meet a fellow new widow.

The new widow was less than three weeks into her journey.  Her husband was killed in a motorcycle accident – a young lady in a car made a turn and crashed into the motorcycle.  He was only 36 when he died. 

It was “nail night” and I was getting my nails done.  The new widow is the cousin of one of the ladies that works at the salon where I get my nails done and was there to get her hair cut.  She was there with her 10-year old son and her “support team” of her mom and her sister.

I recognized the “deer in the headlights” look on her face.  I felt her pain when she said “I can’t afford to lose my job.  I’m a widow with a young son to support.”  

The lady that does my nails introduced me to the new widow by saying that I had also recently lost her “significant other” in a car crash.  The look of understanding in her face bought tears to my eyes.

Her story was similar to mine and Prince Charming’s . . . but more poignant . . . they were high school sweethearts who, with the exception of one small break-up, had not been apart in over 15 years.  They did everything together as a family and the “aloneness” is almost more than she can bear.  

After experiencing all the stuff that people “shouldn’t” say at times like this . . . I did exactly what I’ve told people I wanted them to do for me . . . I hugged her and told her that she wasn’t alone . . . and she hugged me back . . .

I looked at her and instantly saw myself in that position four months ago . . . I wanted to tell her all the stuff other widows have told me along my journey, but I was sure she wouldn’t hear any of it . . . or believe any of it . . . because I’m still struggling to believe it myself.

I saw how far I’ve come in four months . . . and I see how easy it would be to slide backwards . . .

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