The word for today is . . . . heart wrenching . . .
It’s the unexpected things that rip my heart out these days.
There’s a long story behind this so please be patient with me . . .
I’m listening to a re-broadcast of American Top 40 from February 21, 1981 when “Same Old Lang Syne” came on the radio and reduced me to a puddle of tears. For years after Ron and I broke up the first time, he said he would hear this song and think of running into me somewhere and having this kind of conversation with me. He was sad that the song (and our relationship) seemed to have the two people going their separate ways. He said the song always made him cry and it was difficult for him to listen to it. Fast forward about 33 years to our first Christmas together . . . and the first time he heard this song . . . he said he was finally at peace with the song because our story didn’t end like the story in the song . . . for the first time in years he could listen to the song and cry because he was happy with the way his life and our relationship turned out. When the song came on when we were at home, he would hug me tightly and tell me he was thankful that we were “us” again.
Fast forward to today and hearing this song on the radio. It was totally unexpected because who expects to hear a “Christmas” song on the radio in February – but if the song was released at Christmas time in 1980, then it could still be on the charts in February . . . I heard the first few notes and knew exactly what it was . . . and couldn’t bear to turn it off . . . I thought I had some time before I would have to deal with that particular memory . . .
Excuse me while I go blow my nose . . .