Today was my first day back to work.
It was rougher than the visitation. I was trying to work and tell Prince Charming’s story.
At one point I had to ask someone not to cry because “you go, I go” and I’m tired of crying.
The love and support is amazing. And exhausting.
Another rough day behind me.
Today was a good day.
I was home with the puppies for one more day. Tomorrow I shall go back to work. Yea, that’s gonna be fun.
I’m trying to clean up the clutter in the house . . . yea, that’s an ongoing task that will never be finished . . .
I found this picture that one of Prince Charming’s ham radio friends gave me at the visitation the other day.
It captures his joy of all things ham radio related and shows the silly side of his personality. It was taken at Hamvention May 2012 with an antenna that one of his buddies bought.
Even now that he’s gone . . . he makes me smile every day!
One of my happiest memories of dating Prince Charming way back when was sledding at our old elementary school. After all the fun of sledding, we would go to his house and his mom would make cocoa and we would sit in front of the wood stove to keep warm.
Prince Charming and I always planned to do it again but the timing never quite worked out.
Yesterday I woke up to a beautiful snowfall. We had a couple of inches on the ground and more on the way. As soon as I saw it I could hear his voice “let’s go sledding”. So I gathered my siblings (they all live close by) and we went sledding.
Gnomie went with me. Even my oldest sister went down the hill – twice.
Afterwards I went to see Prince Charming’s Mom (she lives next to the school) and she put my clothes in the dryer and we talked about Prince Charming. After that I had an impromptu family dinner with as many of my family members as we could gather together in short notice – which was about all of them.
All in all it was a good day.
Today was the hardest/worst day of my life so far.
Today we buried Prince Charming.
I’m here. I’m upright and functioning.
I’ve learned very important things since Monday.
My friends and family are amazing. I’d always told Prince Charming he had way more friends than he thought. I’m learning I do too.
No matter how hard the task is in front of me seems – there’s another really hard task right behind it.
It isn’t what you say to a grieving person . . . It’s what you do that matters most. Even if it’s listening to her tell the same story for the zillionth time.
I’m stronger than I realized but I have to learn to let people help. It’s part of their grieving process.
There’s just so many things to be done. And most of them can wait.
My worst nightmare has come true.
Prince Charming is gone.
My world turned upside down by a brief visit from two troopers.
There was a horrible accident. The car was totaled.
That horrible sound was me refusing to digest this new reality.
It doesn’t seem real. I expect to wake up and find him sleeping peacefully next to me.
Instead the snoring I hear is Rocky.
Nothing will ever be okay again.
Gnomie is back from his big adventure.
He got to make a trip with Prince Charming for work.
They were off to help out with an emergency . . . Prince Charming was sent to help save the day . . .
Gnomie got to supervise . . .
Poor Gnomie thought that “working with water” meant a trip to the beach . . .
I have a feeling that Gnomie is going to think twice before accepting an offer of a “road trip” from Prince Charming!